Caught With The Apple Red Handed – Confessions of A Ben Torah

Caught With The Apple Red Handed – Confessions of A Ben Torah
Rarely in my life have I been so ashamed as I was this Shabbos morning eventhough no one knew about it except me. I am a working man closing in on the big 40. I consider myself a Ben Torah spending a reasonable amount of time learning each day. Part of being a Ben Torah in my opinion is having Torah and Yiddishkeit as the center of my world with rest of the outside world revolving around it and not vice versa. That being said, during these days of Sefira a Ben Torah focuses on occupying his mind and preparing himself for the upcoming Matan Torah. We are supposed to be excited about it and elevate ourselves day by day. So as a Ben Torah I'd like to think that I am on that path. At the very least I look forward to Shavuos, as I count each passing day of Sefira.

I am also a gadget man and like to keep abreast of the latest technology. Lately I have been following the hype surrounding a new mobile phone that will soon be released on the market. Being that I haven't had a new phone in four years I decided that this could be my dream phone. Lately I spend time every day checking out the rumors and any new information about the secretive features of this new phone. June 9th is the big day that the phone is supposed to be released amid lots of fanfare at a big conference. So I keep following and waiting impatiently.

I don't follow the English date much but as we get closer to Shavuos the dates take on a greater clarity. So much so that when I woke up Shabbos morning a scary thought dawned upon me. Shavuos is getting closer and so is June 9th. Uh Oh, I thought, could it possibly be? I ran in a panic to my trusty calendar and 'lo and behold' my worst fear was realized. June 9th is exactly the day of Shavuos! What a wake up call. Here I am making believe I am Mr. Frum counting Sefira and this year I am anxiously awaiting Shavuos more than ever before but not for the Torah, for a mobile phone. Oy Lanu MiYom HaDin Oy Lanu MiYom HaTochacha!

Maybe I took Shavuos for granted. Maybe I didn't really think about what I get on Shavuos. The Seforim HaKedoshim say that Shavuos is the Rosh HaShanah for Torah and Hashem decides what we get next year. What does that mean? We ask Hashem in davening "V'Sein Chelkeinu BiTorasecha", every one has a certain allotted portion of Torah. On Shavuos Hashem will decide if my portion includes some Tosfos and Rishonim. Will I finally learn Halacha from the Shulchan Aruch like I should? Will I be zocheh to somehow fall into the right place and the right time and actually get introduced to Zohar and Sodos HaTorah? Will things work out at my job so that I will have sufficient time to learn B'Ravchus without many worries in the office? Will my family life be tranquil and not disturb my learning.

This little coincidence was a real Yerida L'Tzorech Aliya for me. It took a mobile phone to teach me what it means to get excited about Shavuos. I will put June 9th out of mind for now and keep focused on the real significance of next Monday. It will be Vav Sivan, the day the world stood still for the most dramatic product release ever. B'Ezras Hashem I hope this year on Shavuos, Hashem will give me lots of processing power to learn torah and many Gigabytes of memory so hopefully I can get to 40 with a little torah knowledge. Then I can start already start dreaming about next year's new models!