Q: Why did Adam and Eve have a perfect marriage?
A: He didn't have to hear about all the men she could have
married, and she didn't have to hear
about the way his mother cooked
Q: What business is a yenta
in?
A: Yours.
Q: How do Jewish wives get their children ready
for dinner?
A: They put them in the car.
Q: What does a Jewish woman do to keep her hands
soft and her nails long?
A: Nothing at all
Q: Define "genius"
A: An average student with a Jewish mother
Q: If Tarzan and Jane were Jewish, what would
Cheetah be?
A: A fur coat
Q: What mechanical device causes the most envy
in a Jewish woman?
A: A Mercedes 550SL convertible
Jewish
proverb: "A Jewish wife will forgive and forget, but she'll never forget
what she forgave."
One of life's
mysteries - how a 2Ib. box of chocolates can make a Jewish woman gain 5lbs.
Another of
life's mysteries is when a Jewish woman hangs something in her wardrobe for a
while and it shrinks two sizes!
The trouble
with some Jewish women is that they get all excited about nothing; then they
marry him.
A Bar Mitzvah
is defined as the day when a Jewish boy comes to realize that he is more likely
to own a professional sports team than he is to play for one.
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